Romantic Provocateur Gifts

Age discrimination is on the rise...'Not with me, Mr Dithers!'

"This will be hilarious!"

The writers group met every Tuesday for support and fellowship.

'They were all out of roses.'

'This is all without rhyme or reason.'

Man proposes using strong flour as a ring.

"Do you have a Venus Fly Trap?"

"I don't pretend to be great. I merely know myself to be very, very good."

"Now give me something intimate to say."

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

"I'm in advertising. . ."

I'm sending myself three Valentine's cards...that should keep my hubby on his toes!

'Honey, this is Alonzo

I thought we'd get fake tattoos of each other's names. If we're still together in 10 years, we'll get real ones.'

When comedians propose marriage.

Memorials of The Great Exhibition - 1851. No. XXII - The crush room at the opera. - 'Mr. Chawbacon's cart stops the way!'

"Our violinist isn't here tonight, but Tony here will be happy to play something romantic on his cymbals for you."

This is very sweet, Phil, but no, I don't want to buy a violin from you.

Performance Artist - Gone to put you off your lunch.

Man is walking his dachshund with a Happy Valentines Day balloon tied around dog's belly lifting it off of the sidewalk.

'If my husband comes home, duck out that door. . . He'll never see you.'

Art that makes you ask questions.

"My reasons for asking for a raise are wholly unselfish. I wish to marry your daughter!"

"Suspect apprehended... Caught bowhunting without a license and indecent exposure..."

'Michelangelo!'

'Aagh- are you sure you checked the smell-by date?'

Heart Flasher

"This is my son, Barry. He was headed for Congress, but instead had made his mark as a prominent internet troll."

'Ralph developed a love potion at the lab, but then the dog drank it.'

"The second I turn 16 I'm joining a conservative political party and then I'll be able to do whatever I want!"

A dog cupid flies an arrow after a dog jumping on a random man's leg.

Cat gives bird Valentine's Card.

'Let's tweet that there's civil unrest in Torquay and see if it gets reported on the news.'

I'm starting to think you're toying with my feelings, Charlene.

"It says here prostate massage can spice things up in the bedroom. It just doesn’t say anything about a giant foam finger."