Romantic Challenges Pillows

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'Well I wouldn't have to fake orgasms if you didn't fake foreplay!'

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

"What do you mean?! That apology is the best piece of fiction I've ever written!"

Tic-tac-toe

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'This marriage is turning into a complete farce.'

"I fell in love with her. Then she mutated."

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

DIY marriage counseling.

'I told my wife she had to choose between me and that precious boat of her's. She called my bluff. Can I sleep on your couch?'

"She said, 'I'll go if you go,' and I said, 'I'll go if you go,' and here we are."

"According to my calculations...school starts in exactly 20 days!"

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

Snow White and her husband go for counselling.

Relationship Issues.

'Will I still be married?'

Worm Bed

"She may be awhile. Her mother's helping her park."

The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.

"We're only staying together for the sake of our marriage guidance counsellor."

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

'We were so attracted to each other - now we're just poles apart'

"Is it me or are the obstacle courses getting harder?"

"We were so happy doc. . . but then she changed!"

'He's not the man I married. In fact, none of them are.'

"We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone."

"I've tried to keep one in the past, but it always flew away when my husband came home. So I thought I'd try this method!"

'First, you have to stop treating your husband like a child.'

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"