Romantic Dilemma Pillows

"My heart says no, my head says maybe, my you-know-what says yes."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'Here's to being in love, in a hurry, and in debt.'

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

"It's not safe to keep meeting like this."

'Sure, I'm nervous. Remember OUR first date?'

You look lovely tonight. It's a good think the coat-check girl let me check my thought balloons. !!

"I mean it this time Brian, it's either me or the jazz!"

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

'You certainly picked your moment to propose!'

"Now we'll see what my husband has to say about this!"

"You’ll meet a beautiful woman whom your mother will loathe."

'Would you like to come over to my place and see a video of my first marriage?'

"Only one Valentines card? Still could have been a lot worse!"

What's your problem? I love my wife... And I hate my mistress.

'I'm the bride's ex boyfriend. Before she says yes, can I just tell her that I've just won the lottery jackpot?!'

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

Lovers Leap Frog

"No, you open yours first."

'I was betting you wouldn't show.'

'Something that says I'm sorry without admitting liability.'

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but actually 47% of 235 people covering 34%..."

"O.K. Where is he?"

Damned if you do Damned if you don't

'Forever, like the mountains of mine waste?'

I always strike out on blind dates

"So how's the date going?

Weddings...

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

'You can forget 'Ladies First' for a start!'

"I want to break up, but he's got an espresso machine."

'You're hopeless Mike, hopeless...'

"Uh-oh this is going to be a tough one."