Romance Rebels T-Shirts

'I'm looking for a card that says if I didn't get you this, I'd never hear the end of it.'

"...Yes, I do. But, I also believe in hate at first sight."

"Sending a text wishing me happy anniversary is not very romantic! . . . Especially on my birthday!"

After the Sentence

'No, but thanks for asking,'

Cake Escape

You're the olive in my martini

Lord Byron

The Bare Minimum

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

Heart to heart talk.

"Could you speak a little louder? I'm recording this."

Dating the efficiency expert.

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

Graffitti.

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

"Wellness clinics, stress-management checkups, hypertension screenings, lab tests, crisis after crisis. Fibre foods, fish-oil capsules, unsaturated spreads, plaque. Say what they may, McCormack, we did it our way."

Wedding Wellies

"Monogamy works for me, but it doesn't work for Enid."

Jenga!!!

'One question, Vicar. Is it bad luck to invite any of the other people we're sleeping with?'

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

We should talk...

'And you must be Hank, my husband's new business partner!'

"I've had many men in this town darling, but many men have not had me."

'Wow! Who knows what eroticism lurks in the heart of a sister.'

Too Weird to Have a Husband

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

The trouble was she never knew where to draw the line

'She kept pinching the Vicar's bum!'

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

Female Dominance.

Church Drive-Thru.

'This is our last date, Harry. I think I should see other weirdos.'