Romance Rebels Gifts

'I'm looking for a card that says if I didn't get you this, I'd never hear the end of it.'

"...Yes, I do. But, I also believe in hate at first sight."

"Sending a text wishing me happy anniversary is not very romantic! . . . Especially on my birthday!"

'Your place or mine?'

After the Sentence

'No, but thanks for asking,'

You're the olive in my martini

Lord Byron

Cake Escape

The Bare Minimum

Heart to heart talk.

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

"Could you speak a little louder? I'm recording this."

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

Dating the efficiency expert.

Graffitti.

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

"Wellness clinics, stress-management checkups, hypertension screenings, lab tests, crisis after crisis. Fibre foods, fish-oil capsules, unsaturated spreads, plaque. Say what they may, McCormack, we did it our way."

Jenga!!!

"Monogamy works for me, but it doesn't work for Enid."

'One question, Vicar. Is it bad luck to invite any of the other people we're sleeping with?'

Wedding Wellies

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'She kept pinching the Vicar's bum!'

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

Too Weird to Have a Husband

'Wow! Who knows what eroticism lurks in the heart of a sister.'

"I've had many men in this town darling, but many men have not had me."

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

'And you must be Hank, my husband's new business partner!'

Female Dominance.

We should talk...

The trouble was she never knew where to draw the line

Church Drive-Thru.