Role-playing Game Fan Gifts

Kday & Knight Chemist

"Quenching your thirst for vengeance on his cowering carcass will have to wait; his schedule is full. I can squeeze you in next Friday."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

"Most of the time it's 'Me Tarzan, you Jane', until we get into the bedroom. Then he's all, 'You Tarzan, Me Jane'."

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

'Let's play doctor. You can be my malpractice lawyer.'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

I'm tired of your games, Al. MY games? look who's talking! The guy with the role-playing hand puppets!

'How can you say I'm a bad actress, Tarzan?'

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

'Let's play doctor - you be the patient, you be the surgeon, and I'll be the malpractice-attorney.'

Man playing chess from his parked car.

'It was worse than that ? I was slimed by a lawyer!'

When we said we wanted you to have more fun training we didn't mean THAT much fun.

"I'm sensing that the role-playing homework I gave you didn't work."

"And what if I don't want to be Jack or Ennis?"

'We're playing 'mummy'!'

Kid in pedal police car pulling over a kid on a trike

Have you seen my iPhone? No. You lost it? I may have misplaced it. Big deal. You hate it. It'll turn up. Exactly, I hate it. I absolutely hate it. I especially hate the Scrabble app and I absolutely can't wait to find the phone so I can mock it further! Help: I love my iPhone. Oh dear. Trouble brewing. To be continued ...

'Little Nurse' daughter trying to distract Daddy so he cuts himself shaving

Fancy Dress Box

'You knew my alignment was chaotic good when you married me!'

"These LARPERS are a bit more subtle and reality-based."

'I still say I should be at the REAR end, Rodney!'

"The patient is ready for his injections, doctor."

"Hey I know, let's play bored kids hanging around after school."

'I'm going out to forge an alliance.'

"I'm the mommy and he's the daddy and Teddy is the #@&&!# kid who keeps us from having time to do anything!"

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

Chess Halloween

"Armstrong, have you seen my phone?" "Indeed I have, minion." "I’ve trained the café’s rodents to abscond with unattended cell phones, which I then return to patrons, earning their gratitude and loyalty." "You did not." "No, I didn’t. But it’s always been a dream of mine." "Very bad man." "Thank you for the opportunity to role play."