Roast Chicken Lover Gifts

'Who orderes the roasted chicken plate and who ordered the soup?'

The Rooster Comedian.

Silence of the Chickens...

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

Golfer mistakes a hen's egg for his golf ball.

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

'Can he come out and play?'

'She looks just like you when you were that age.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

'This race is simply too close to call.'

Seminal moments in Chicken History

'Let's face it George: we're not spring chickens anymore...'

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

A bit of Newlyn.

'You can't have a drumstick because this is roast beef.'

"A little lamb please."

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

'Tasty bird.'

"Well, it's the same old story, we just don't squark anymore."

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

Free Range Chickens

'Who said you could come out of your room?'

'Careful, it's not politically correct to say I rule the roost anymore...'

Chicken Road Crossing

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

'Hey, look at this beauty... Man, I love those crunchy, well tanned sweethearts!'

Drink it! We've all had to sacrifice our kids for our careers in one way or another... And besides, you need the protein, Rock.

"Mum, what is a nugget?"