Road Safety Sage Gifts

'OK, I'll admit it. You're a genius at parallel parking.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Please Drove Carefully.

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

Touring Cyclist

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

'Your Grounded!'

Computer Controlled Car

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

Bedroom Traffic Control

Nice park. . .

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

"Don't forget your gunfighting helmet."

One Way - Yield

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

Driver sees road sign: 'Right Lane Doomed'

"Let it go. You have to learn to pick your battles."

Last Road Rage Therapist for 500 Miles

'Squint your eyes and grit your teeth so I can make sure it's you.'

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

"Aways the victim."

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

Attention: Speed Troughs

'I know a lot of you have been sharing your opinions regarding health care and I just wanted to remind you, stay out of the road!'

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.