Road Safety Renegade Pillows

Bike lane.

'Let's not go by the book.'

Breaking News: Earth Crosses Multiple Lanes, Crashes into Sun... Distracted Orbiting to Blame.

Tractor Racing

'Your Grounded!'

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

"Why'd the chicken cross the road?"

Attention: Speed Troughs

'I know a lot of you have been sharing your opinions regarding health care and I just wanted to remind you, stay out of the road!'

'All these new regulations will totally alter the way we screw the consumer.'

-You need a permit to fish here. -I'm doing okay with a worm, thank you

Hang on, don't cross now: I can see a car coming...

How Am I Driving?

'I looked, and the Ten Commandments don't say ANYTHING about running with scissors!'

'Deer and Game Crossing'.

"Over the river and through a ridiculous detour that has us in the middle of who-knows-where, to Grandfather’s house we go!"

'Looks like Ed Miliband's attempt to stop the race failed.'

'I'll be the designated driver - you be the designated texter.'

'But this IS my mobile home!'

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

Solar Storm Expected!

What if animals made roadside memorials?

"We ran out of salt for the roads, but we had plenty of pepper..."

First fisherman says, 'What happens if the DNR finds us?' Other replies, 'Let's just hope they're into catch and release.'

'No zebras as yet. . .but we have had two school kids and a lollipop lady!'

"The soft, flexible, extendible bumper gently nudges the cyclist safely out of harm's way."

"Are you telling me you won't even ask the computerized navigational system for directions?"

'Quick, turn the siren on!'

"Your businessman's lunch, sir - But you need to sign this compliance self-audit checklist first.

"I hate to disappoint you son, but those giant craters you see isn't the moon, it's our street."

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

'Remember...No hexing and driving!'

SmartphoneDumb Driver.

'The cows are out and are not expected back.'