Rinksider Gifts

Curling Rocks!

Yeah, I've been driving in circles for an hour looking for a place to park. Zamboni.

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

"Hey Ref - any chance you can get those buzzards to quit circling over my fighter?"

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

'How many times I gotta tell you? Don't pay any attention to which camera has the red light on!'

"Just so you know, despite the horrifying beating you're about to receive, I'm actually a pretty good hockey player."

'Awfully glad you could make it,old boy and please excuse the gloves,won't you?'

"OK, you have your assignments for today, and remember, safety first: Ensure the kids wear their riding helmets..."

"I can't understand women. They're happy punching each other around a boxing ring but ask them to hit a tennis ball and they scream in agony!"

Map for directions on a hockey rink.

'I don't understand it. He's just as strong as ever.'

'This is where his experience begins to pay off.'

'He's tiring? What happened to round four 'he's ready to go!'?'

Tip jar at boxing match.

'An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. . .'

'Excuse me. Is this seat 27c?'

'A meeting of the 'Bandy' association for the promotion of 'Hockey on the ice.''

Knock-out at the boxing match.

"Just so you know, despite the horrifying beating you're about to get, I'm actually a good hockey player."

Man with big ears at the Tyson fight - "You're taking a risk sat ringside mate."

'When that bell rings, yank that string THREE TIMES and go into him like a kamikaze pilot!'

"Listen, if you don't break when I ask you to, the next time I'll give you a thick ear."

'The ice is quite thin this evening.'

Ice hockey player with testicles on his stick.

'The champ has absolutely no respect for his opponent's punching power.'

'What do we do now?'

'It's a long way from the dressing room to the ring, isn't it?'

'Tough guy, eh? Want to step outside?'

"Have you suffered an injury at work? You could entitled to damages through a personal injury claim."

"Are we late?"

'He's clean!!'