Return Renegade Gifts

It says 'item is returnable if repackaged exactly as sent.'"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Queen of Upcycling!

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

That's supposed to say garage sale!

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

Today, a special retro segment of The Fad Herald. It's the Fad Herald. Off the hook! Hey jive turkeys, here's what's not cool: Fossil fuels, dependence on Mideast oil, long gas lines. Here's what's groovy: Solar power, alternative fuels, energy independence. Can you dig? The world is changing, baby! Instead of solar panels, I'm buying a sweet 8-track player. Next week, a look ahead to 2040. What's out: Waiting in long lines to fill up the spacecraft with gas.

"I don't need your resume. Your current employer forwarded me a ton of security video that you're featured in."

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"You gave me the wrong drink. I demand a total refund!!" "OK. Where's the drink?" "What do you mean? I drank it. It wasn't till I was done that I realized it was the wrong drink. The right drink leaves a different aftertaste." "You can't finish the drink and then ask for a refund. That's not how it works." "You didn't tell me that before I paid for the wrong drink. So that's on you." "That's not how it works!"

Music Freak.

"That's my performance review!? Two thumbs up?"

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

'Looks like Ed Miliband's attempt to stop the race failed.'

"I want you to start thinking back inside the box."

'But this IS my mobile home!'

"Where do you keep the non-educational stuff?"

"Why always a book report? Why not ever a TV show report?"

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

Mary Quant.

We are on the move. . .

Leonardo Meets the I.R.S.

'The cows are out and are not expected back.'

"Well, I liked it until I read the reviews."

Confession. Terrible confession. My favorite kind. By day, I work at this caf

TV tie-in book signpost.

'Who called for a trouble shooter?'

'I think my work here is done.'

The Mysterious World of Ligand Substitution.

Race car driver sees Pit crew member holding sign: Stop And Ask For Directions.

'O.K., I admit I'm impressed by your handbrake skills but does reverse gear work?'

Sales Clerk tricks woman into an instant merchandise exchange.

'About this trip to the Amazon jungle...I want my money back!'

"It' an aftermath of the African campaign."