Retro Comics Fans Gifts

Ice Skaters

'Better stick close to the cave today — the big ones are biting.'

BEWARE OF THE DOG!; 'So much for management's pledge to bargain in good faith.'

"Everybody comfortable? Got what they want? Know their place?"

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

'It's nice, but I wish we could get more than one channel.'

"First of all, I would like to express my gratefulness to all those wonderful ancestors of mine who helped to make this glorious day possible."

Phone. Oh, no! My Clark Kent clothes are gone! Secret Identity Theft.

Oops! Maybe we better make the chicken first.

'My eyesight's not what it used to be.'

"Where's Waldo and his little-know cousin what's Wanda."

'It was your imagination. There's no little kid under your bed!'

"Now do you believe me?"

You're too enamored of wealth, Al. As it says in the Bible, "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle that for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." Is that a regular Camel, or does it have a filter tip?

"Hatless" Bill Johnson

His burro injured, Scotty hauls ass for the nearest town.

"What a pity! Mr Grogan took it on the lam not more than five minutes ago."

"Do I use Google Maps driving or walking directions?"

'A few years ago I switched from the utility belt to utility suspenders.'

How We Know You're Getting Old

Cabman, unhappy with his fare, accuses a lady's husband of not being a gentleman

'Did that thing just abduct your dollar.'

"Cowabunga! Guess whose arthritis just kicked in? Advanced age, mutant ninja turtles"

"I'm a hunter." "I'm a gatherer."

"Darn fool! That's not what I meant when I told him to get out there and put on a brave face."

"I can't pay for this so I'll wash the dishes."

"With wins today, the Monster team and the Ghost team are moving on to the big game in two weeks." The Monsters will need to play better against the Ghosts. Dracula must come out for blood next time. And Frankenstein has to show up with his head on straight. If the fans hate the Ghosts, it might be impossible to beat them. Yeah, they love hearing "Boo!".

9-1-1. What is your emergency? I've been held captive in a lame comic strip since 1989.

'What do you mean you can't slam dunk?'

Fat footman has been told he will be dismissed if he doeas not lose weight

Mr. Punch cycling

"That said, however, let's go see if she's got any roommates."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. VIII

'Helen, for the last time. Where are my eggs?'

An alcoholic returning to his old ways