Retirement Savior Gifts

"Relax, it's not for you. I'm here for you 401 (k)."

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

"Honestly, John, I'm not angry! I was going to suggest you give up driving even before you hit my car in the parking lot!"

401K

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

RRSP once stood for Registered Retirement Savings Plan, now stands for Really, Really Small Potatoes!

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

"It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your 401k is?"

'You're lucky you're just a kid and don't have to worry about things like going out and getting a job when you're supposed to be retired.'

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

Old man fighting against time with an arm wrestle.

Pension planning for Brexit

"Our generous pensions are unsustainable so I'm firing you."

'Judge Bush agreed to come out of retirement on a temporary basis.'

"There's no getting away from the numbers....only by forgetting holidays, giving up drink, the cinema, meals out and socialising...will we be able to afford any quality of life when we retire."

You wait until the polar icecaps melt my friend then we will see who is laughing!

"It's your turn, kid."

'You're lucky, you're one of our few employees that will live long enought to earn a pension.'

'Lager Lout'- 'Saga Lout'

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

Beard, socks and sandals.

"If we want to get across our warnings about the dire consequences of not saving for a future then we need powerful dramatic message!"

Houdini 2019

Still on the Back Burner

"I'm old enough to remember when people thought retirement had something to do with not having a job. Don't laugh! We used to believe all sorts of ridiculous stuff!"

"I'd prefer this to a gold watch any day."

"I rolled over my 401K into the football pool."

"It's great that you showed me how to get my 401K to roll over, but now it just plays dead."

"There's more to being a pensions adviser than just handling the figures..."

'Watch out for Harold Smedly...He has wandering long-reach pick up tools!..'

"He retired at an executive, returned as a contractor, became a consultant and now he's a brooding presence."

"The pensions industry needs to dramatically improve the way we communicate with customers."

How to save the Planet...

'We scrimp and save and sock away money so that we don't need to rely on Social Security when we retire - and what does he do? He blows it all on a free agent.'

IPCC climate change report