Retail Reality Fan Gifts

Complaints: 'And another thing...!'

"If you want all our money in a plastic bag then I have tocharge you for the bag. Do you wish to pay cash or with card?"

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

Sale.

Police film evidence

A couple decides what to watch.

Prepare yourself, America. Dancing with the Stars is poised to present a new 12-week competition. And you'll never guess who's dancing now! Listen to the passion and fight in our newest celebrity dancer

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

SupermarketAwful Market.

Dispute between Pelosi and Trump

After the Nordstrom-Nordstream Merger

'Our giant sale now on!'

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

'Scrub that previous message Houston. There is no, I repeat no intelligent life on Mars.'

'I'm a has-been celebrity - get me in there!'

Election Report. The political debates and huge ratings. "Dancing Around the Issues" topped "Dancing with the Stars"!

'A penny for my thoughts. Now accepting all major credit cards.'

"The boss is mad at me. I did something really, really dumb today!"

"It must be near New Year's Day...There are Easter eggs in the shop windows!"

After finishing his two year residency at Drai's Beach club, in Las Vegas, D.J. Pauly D decides to return to his first love theatre.

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

'...Nadine Dorries has sent you a present from Australia. She said as soon as she saw it she thought of you!'

As Seen On TV

Man sees capitol building: 'Truth, Justice, Reality TV'

'You don't know how much it would mean to me if you could just jump.'

The Mom quiz show

"Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs would make a great reality show."

'OK, you've got your problems. Now, you can keep them and walk away - or trade them with whoever's behind door number one, two or three.'

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

'Take us to your - y'know whasisname - that chap who came runner up in 'Pop Idol''