Retail Lover Gifts

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

SAGE (unknown model)

M&S profits soar - 'That'll be all the underpants you've been buying me.'

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

"Amazon's new A.I. just 'gets' me."

"Sure, shopping online is faster and cheaper, but there's something almost sensuous about carrying an armload of packages!"

Sale.

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

A young couple selects items from a shop.

"Buying me a new pair of shoes would go a long way toward making this world a less dangerous place."

'How much would you take off for cash?'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

SupermarketAwful Market.

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

Last Chance for Everything.

Self-Checkout.

After the Nordstrom-Nordstream Merger

'Our giant sale now on!'

"...And our 'Holiday Scented' candle smells just like credit cards."

'A penny for my thoughts. Now accepting all major credit cards.'

"It must be near New Year's Day...There are Easter eggs in the shop windows!"

'Don't just stand there doing nothing! Sell yourself a suit!'

"Sorry, Martin, but because you're the weakest link in our food chain here, you're fired."

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

'Cool, a wheel. Now you can take me shopping.'

"How much is the sign?"