Retail Enthusiast Gifts

Bet You Wish You Could Afford This Stuff!

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

Black Friday

Stocktaker counts contents of baked-bean tins.

Loyalty Card

Shopping fatigue.

'Our prices are drastically marked down from their drastic markup!'

'You knew I was an impulse shopper when you married me!'

SupermarketAwful Market.

Complaints - "About this gas lighter..."

Writers's Block - Temporary/Permanent.

"I invented 'shopping' and I haven't seen my wife since."

"I'm afraid our credit department has turned you down!"

"See this area right here—that's where we'd like to open a coffee shop."

Empty shops.

"I see your consumer confidence remains undeterred."

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

'Our giant sale now on!'

'Brilliant idea, Simkins, the old price was actually higher than the present one!'

Clothes for the Headless

'And on the 8th day God held a sale'

'I think I've cracked our marketing problem.'

Cathy Is Buy-Curious.

'Don't just stand there doing nothing! Sell yourself a suit!'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"Hey - aren't you the owner of the store?"

The joy of browsing.

Angry customer and lazy shopkeeper

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"Excuse me, are you hiring for the summer?"

Closed: The Buck Stopped Elsewhere.

"Roger ALWAYS puts out customers FIRST!"

"You can't find the menswear department? Oh, I'm sorry, Sir- I was standing in front of it."

"I've had a very trying day. I've tried on dresses, shoes..."

"If my wife wants to know where anything is, don't tell her."