Retail Adventurer Gifts

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"Happy Easter!"

GARAGE SALE TOUR BUS

The Shop-a-thon.

Religious figure with many arms trying on perfume.

'This could be a swell time to buy our selves out!'

'Fashion Victim.'

"I love holiday shopping, but with all the scams this time of year I must be careful."

"How was work?"

Myths and legends...

'No Renee, not until you get two degrees, pass a rigorous physical, and beat out thousands of other qualified individuals.'

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

The Salesman

'Have you been waiting long?'

Childrens Books. This pop-up book would make a great 3-D movie!

Crime in bookshop

"I'm part of the problem and loving it!"

"Great for worship then! Great for retail now!"

SupermarketAwful Market.

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

'Our giant sale now on!'

After the Nordstrom-Nordstream Merger

Run from the hills!

'To be honest, that's all most people read.'

'We leave for France tomorrow. I just can't wait to visit all those famous museum gift shops!'

'Remember Jones, the customer is always right, no matter how stupid and ignorant he may be.'

'There's more than one kind of deficit.'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

'Turn we women loose in the malls - that'll stimulate the economy.'

Sign on a sale bin at a bookstore that reads "Latte-Damaged Books".

'A penny for my thoughts. Now accepting all major credit cards.'

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."