Restless Dreamers T-Shirts

Insomniacs Support Group - "Ron, how am I suppose to help you if you keep falling asleep?"

"Why is it always me that has to get up just as I'm falling asleep to do things I forgot."

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"I wouldn’t say they’re user-friendly."

Art of Surviving

'Just think...summer's coming, and everyday will be like Saturday morning!'

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

Wide-awake.

Moonbillies.

"At least my putting has improved."

"It's 2 A.M. Do you know where your p***s is?"

I was awake all last night. Me, too. I'm exhausted. Ditto!! Thank heavens for work. And for today's staff meeting! It's the only place I can sleep!

"Sleep? No, I'm the anxiety fairy. How about a cuppa joe?"

Castaway on island with just one tree has hammock washed up on shore.

Nothing gives me a greater feeling of accomplishment than not accomplishing anything.

'Sweet!' Boy sees a bin marked imaginary friends.

'All the stress of the job went away once I stopped giving a damn.'

Wheel of Sleep Misfortune

I love the optimism on new year's day! Yeah, breaking the seal on a new year is link unpacking a new gadget. It's all shiny and it seems like in some way, big or small, your life is going to get better

"Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?"

"Would you like to pay with card, cash or the dim and shredded remains of my remaining dreams?"

Lottery Here. Don't you know the lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math? Yes, but we're hoping for a huge tax refund.

"Don't forget you have to pay alimony."

"Yes I DO mind being put on hold! I only have a two week life span."

"I'd like to announce my candidacy for President of the United States."

'It just turned tomorrow.'

My running routine, my sleep routine, my self-care routine and my food prep routine.

Morning Genie

"I haven't the heart to tell him there's no such place as Shangri-La."

"I've counted 53 in this flock! What about you Bob? Bob?"

My inomnia wouldn't be so bad if I didn't lie awake worrying about it.

"It's too late to worry anymore tonight, I'll get up early tomorrow."

'Wake up, Mr. Granger, you can see the doctor about your insomnia now.'

"Decaf... I distincly ordered DECAF..."