Resource Optimizer Gifts

Blowing dust off an order book.

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

Scarcity

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

The new contract didn't leave him much room to maneuver his hoverdesk.

Population rocket

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

In the future, wars will be fought over water.

Don't Waste A Moment! Put Down That Magazine And Get Fit While You Sit!

Reuse it or lose it.

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

"There is a great deal of evidence that big savings can be made if departments shared resources... But I suspect that implementing the changes might be problematic if we can't even get Norman to lend out his pencil sharpener."

'You've been rearranging the furniture again, haven't you?'

BMA criticises 'Black Hole' of NHS IT spending

'Making staff get a sick note after one day is essential if we're to make the whole system work more efficiently!'

"It's a terrific space, Tony—but do you think the TV will fit?"

Castle Efficiency

How judicious you are/How thin you spread it

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

"The mirrors really do make this apartment look bigger."

"And these are the Andersons, our tenants."

The Devolution of Man

"You said to start the laundry and bathe the cat, so I thought I could save time if..."

'Managing finance is integral to this post. How would you respond to a perfectly reasonable request for extra funds?'

"That's your tiny house!"

Valuable Water

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

'How do you like the new cubicle?' - 'Can I have my old office back please.'

"It's an alert from my smart desk. It wants me to go paperless because it can no longer bear the weight of all the paper I use."

"Just think- if it really was 'unlivably small,' would they have installed a permanent Ping-Pong table?"

'I'd like to request flexible working to avoid my family.'

Silly man ordered a bed that is too big for his room.

World Meat Consumptiom