Resolution Re-evaluators Gifts

Maybe you should have called them "The Ten New Year's Resolutions" --- that way they might have lasted at least a couple of weeks.

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

"Where do you see yourself getting drunk in five years?"

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

"New Year's resolutions are fine, but we should really focus on squad goals."

1080P New Year's Resolution

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

"My new year's resolution. . . .Not to drink out of the toilet."

D I E T F We said we'd stick together this time, but we really knew it would only last a day or two.

"My primary challenge is to strip away the hardened carapace of societal expectations..."

Dear Diary...Resolutions

Wild Animal Park. How are the animals doing with their new year's resolutions? Good! The gazelle is trying to slow down and enjoy life, and the sloth is exercising more! What's the goat's resolution? To be more careful about what he eats? No, he just wants to spend more time with the kids this year. I heard the doe made a resolution to save some money. You misunderstood, Ernie. She didn't make any resolutions for herself. Her goal this year is to convince the male members of her specie

'I can't read my New Year's resolutions -- I must have spilled beer on them last night.'

"Your New Years resolution was to give up the grog!"

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

Who am I kidding?

'I'm graphing the likelihood of me keeping this New Year's resolutions based on all of my previous resolutions. It doesn't look good for me.'

"This year I'm going to lose weight!"

"THIS YEAR I'M GOING TO GET IN SHAPE."

'I made up my mind to spend less time on line, and I was doing real well 'til they brought the computer back from the shop.'

"I'm starting my diet today."

New Year's Resolutions...

'To show I'm serious about giving up smoking for new year, I'm going to sign this pledge.'

A slim Santa emerges from slimming club.

"Oh well. . . another New Year's resolution shot!"

'Every year, I make a New Year's resolution, but I never stick to it, and it's embarrassing when people ask me about it...this year I'm just going to lie through my teeth when people ask.'

'Could you put me into an induced coma for four weeks?'

'I know I promised to get off my backside and take up a sort once the Olympics had finished - but it ain't over yet!'

I made a resolution to have a more positive attitude, but god knows how long that's gonna last...

"I'm having a dry January...Dry Martini, dry sherry, dry gin..."

Resolutions.