Resolution Achiever Gifts

How much for rock-hard abs? $200 for a basic six-pack, includes high-intensity training sessions. Lemme think about it. I'll be here. What's going on? The new year's resolutions are trickling in. You're working as a physical trainer now? I got into resolution outsourcing. What? People pay me to fulfill their resolutions. They vow to get in shape, or stop procrastinating, or be more honest about their feelings. I take on the task and then they check it off their list. I know what you're thinking

"Good news, Terry, I've hit my target weight. We can start having chips again every night."

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

Let's Celebrate

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

The rope to success.

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

'We can't find a pond small enough where you'd be a big fish.'

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

The trick to losing weight is to eat a small portion and wait 10 minutes. By then your resolve has caught up with your appetite!

Successful sales people are avid goal setters...

"New Year's resolutions are fine, but we should really focus on squad goals."

'Let it go. Get on with your death.'

"10,000 steps a day? I can do that."

My resolution this year? Getting in shape so I can lift my favorite snacks!

Well done, I hear you hit your target. Yes, a week for two in Hawaii.

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

Woman and scales.

"My new year's resolution. . . .Not to drink out of the toilet."

"Hannibal got elephants over the Alps. Bearing that in mind, somebody think of something."

Succeed.

New Years Reolutions

"I feel like all I did in January was work out, eat healthy, strive for meaningful and balanced relationships, and improve my sleep schedule -- thank god that nightmare's over."

Employee of the Month - male.

'Is this making it?'

"We're cutting back on therapy. You?"

"Your New Years resolution was to give up the grog!"

Wild Animal Park. How are the animals doing with their new year's resolutions? Good! The gazelle is trying to slow down and enjoy life, and the sloth is exercising more! What's the goat's resolution? To be more careful about what he eats? No, he just wants to spend more time with the kids this year. I heard the doe made a resolution to save some money. You misunderstood, Ernie. She didn't make any resolutions for herself. Her goal this year is to convince the male members of her specie

D I E T F We said we'd stick together this time, but we really knew it would only last a day or two.