Report Card Fan Gifts

'The teacher says you're very clever for your age!'

Happy Easter

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

"I'm not happy about what the economists are predicting."

'The whole floor got together and came up with a few things you could work on.'

"I passed the three R's. Now I need some R and R!"

"I thought those D's meant dedicated!"

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

'And it's not just me...Ms. Anthrope doesn't seem to like anyone.'

'Gee, where are all the crowds this year?'

'Look, dear, they offer cloud storage for optimistic economic projections...it's called Cloud 9.'

'I figured if 1 is good for milk, why not schoolwork, too?'

'A chocolate shake please. Shaken not stirred.'

'If you are not careful, son, you will be mathematically eliminated from all of the Ivy League schools.'

"Just sign it, or I'll post YOUR old report cards on social media."

Weather forecast.

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

"Your school report is brilliant! It's going straight into the fireproof box for safe keeping..."

'So what is the consulting that you got an 'A' for?'

Surveillance over the suggestion box.

Heyday.

'I don't want to make you feel bad, but I got four stars.'

"Yes, it's report card time again."

"Very impressive. Leave it with me. Mommy will get back to you by the week."

'I remember when tea leaves were the state-of-the-art method of forecasting.'

Have Your Cards Read Here

"And now for the weather forecast. . . it's cold."

"My teacher forgot to congratulate me on my great math grade. She was too busy calling Ripley's Believe It Or Not."

"Your condition's not rare, but it's very collectible."

'It's an obvious case of identity theft.'

'We've certainly come a long way from just a twenty per cent chance of precipitation in the form of snow.'

"I was hoping my employee evaluation would be more than, 'You don't suck.'"

"No recordering allowed!"

Strange that every teacher crossed out the original comment and wrote XLANT!

'I finally got a good one!'