Rental Warrior Gifts

"You do realize you're not getting your security deposit back, right?"

Where there's a Mall--There's a Way.

'The difference between the sexes...First Contact...'

'So that's agreed, we terrify people with stories about living to a hundred in poverty and hope that makes them drop dead early.'

"Returns"

"Ooh look, the high street's evolved to survive!"

House hunting is cruel.

'Hold my purse. I'm going in only to complain.'

The interminable!

'Can I assume from the rent that this place comes with its own butler?'

"The landlord has promised to sort out the damp problems."

Sold It All.

'I didn't even know the carnival was in town!'

Crazy Ed's Warehouse - body in freezer - "Nobody beats our prices and gets away with it."

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

The lessor of two evils.

"Any chance of some credit?"

Excess Baggage: As soon as you pick a vacation destination, people who have never been there start to tell you horror stories about the place.

First hurdle to getting a loan. Angry woman.

"When you pay the rent for your one-room studio, you mustn't think about what you can get for that amount back in Iowa."

"While we do appreciate your diligence... It's not the store's policy to shoot shoplifters!"

The Great Out-doors

'I just asked if you were finding everything alright. I never said I worked here.'

'Surely it is no longer legal to include 'deposit of your first-born child'?'

"Mr. Rod gave me my employee review. He said I totally 'meet expectations'."

"Mind wiping that scanner first? There's no telling whose stuff has been dragged over it."

'...Hello?...Holidays From Hell...?'

Excess Baggage: The airlines will hold your connecting flight just long enough so you can watch it leave without you.

"I'm addicted to online shoppin. It's so bad that I have a hallway full of unopened parcels."

Generation Rend. Young man rending his garments in anguish at extortionate rents.

Tenants and Landlords - 'Are we nearly there? ...'