Remodeling Gifts

"I put in a skylight and it's made a world of difference."

Please pardon the inconvenience while we remodel.

'We could either give you a $50,000 home improvement loan, or $2,000 to just blow your house up.'

"The distressed-style wood flooring we installed in the kitchen seems to have crept into Fred!"

"Well, you could wish for a new kitchen and a bathroom renovation; or alternatively you could just wish for a less idle husband."

What ever happened with that old shack you bought in the woods? You were going to rehab and flip it. It's going well. So far I've downloaded and categorized every single episode of "Property Brothers" and "Income Property." I had a little setback, though. The hard drive where I thought I'd stored "Curb Appeal" is filled with "Star Trek" instead. You bought that shack seven years ago. Counselor Troi is distracting.

We prefer "kitchen surface installers." not "counter-fitters."

Ask Sadie. Sadie, my wife deserves so much more than I can give her. What can I buy her for our upcoming 36th wedding anniversary? - Wayne. *Actual reader letter. The 36th wedding anniversary? Isn't that wood paneling? What? First is paper, second is cotton, third is leather, and so forth. But wood paneling? Stucco? She has no clue. But she intuits these are the remodeling years.

DIY'ers Heaven. I wonder if I can get under this floor covering and take a gander at the subfloor

'CLEAR!'

'Uh...which part of 'perfect' don't you understand?'

'Anything I can break has to go.'

Tangled Web We Weave Construction -Remodeling : multi-tasking spider on phones and compiter.

"I told you if we worked together we would finish in no time."

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"I'm bored - let's buy a house in the country that has lots of problems."

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

"I'm sick of the same old thing. How about frosting and sprinkles?"

'I'm so excited to be remodeling the bathroom'

'Gerald was stripping some old wallpaper, and there it was - Leonard Da Vinci's lost fresco ‘The Battle of Anghiari'.'

"Perhaps a cozy scarf to go with the hat?"

DIY enthusiasts find a time portal behind their old wallpaper

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

"Well..I think the old Thermograph machine I rescued from work goes a treat with our kitchen units."

"If you can successfully complete a building permit for your home renovation, you win a prize!"

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

'I WANTED to paint the room a shade of green, but gave up somewhere between chartreuse and citrine.'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

'Mary, I believe in historic preservation, too, but ... '