Remodelling Gifts

"I've decided to redecorate...starting with you!"

'...And this is a picture of when I got here...Here's one when I put on new rims...'

"Oh yes, you can't even recognize the old shoe since the remodel."

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

"I'm sick of the same old thing. How about frosting and sprinkles?"

'I'm so excited to be remodeling the bathroom'

Vampire coming out of a body piercing shop with a stake in his heart

That every day look.

'I WANTED to paint the room a shade of green, but gave up somewhere between chartreuse and citrine.'

'Mon Dieu! This year, your collection is really daring, mon cher Karl!'

"Perhaps a cozy scarf to go with the hat?"

"That's a very good suggestion, perhaps one of the men would like to make it?"

Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.

'I'd say the nerve pain you're having in your jaw is due to an arrow through it, but perhaps you'd like to get a 2nd opinion from a dentist.'

'Stop complaining and be thankful we found a place for you in the restructuring!'

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

"I look kind of nice today. . . How long have I been this ugly?"

God bless our home equity line of credit.

Modular Offices

'Well, why didn't you say you wanted the office to be functional?'

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'

A Friend in Need.

"It's not for you, it's for the paparazzi."

"This area is popular with would-be actresses and models,we call it 'Silicon Implants'."

Top model

Kelly Mittendorf

"Well, you could wish for a new kitchen and a bathroom renovation; or alternatively you could just wish for a less idle husband."

'I'm sorry - but do you realize how much I was spending on shampoo and conditioner?'

Ever wonder why we debated what color fridge to buy?

Artistic Licence.

The Coffee Tattoo

"Can you smell that, Jacobs? That’s the smell of me about to offer you a retirement package."

As models become skinnier, so do the mannequins.

Perp Walk Fashion Show