Reluctant Leader Pillows

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this committee.'

'Liquor will solve this problem, chief!'

"I am not asking for directions."

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

'I had a great year and I wasn't even trying.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

Stop staring at that screen saver!

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

"You're going to the Partner's Social whether you like it or not!"

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

"The boss is on a working vacation and we're on a nonworking vacation."

Hunting - Man asked to go hunting by his wife

"The only thing I like more than running is everything else."

Summer Reading

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

'Who cares where Waldo is?'

Man Readig Paper

'You were talking in your sleep again.'

"My physical therapist says this is the worst possible position you can lie in."

'You can't do this to me, Arlene! -- I'm not the outdoorsy TYPE!'

"Every year it's the same story...dangerous situations. Slippery slopes. Inescapable traps. Horrible creatures. But I trudge forward because no matter what...it's hard to avoid the first day of school."

This week, House Manager Blowviatt has been asked to avoid the appearance of playing to the cameras.

"This could be a job for....Slothman. Nahhh."

"Sorry, I can't make it tonight - I have too good a parking sport."

"For Christ's sake, Bob, tuck your shirt in."

"We just weren't compatible.Her body-clock was telling her to settle down and have kids,and mine was telling me that the pub was open."

"Frank's trying to outreach to people who only come to the library to use the washroom!"