Reluctant Jogger Gifts

What would it take to get you to start running? Frankly, doctor, it would take someone chasing me.

'He stated jogging to work.'

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'

Robber on treadmill

"Shhh! I'm hiding from Mistress who wants to go on a walk! It's cold and raining outside: no way I'm wearing that stupid coat again!"

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

'How's the water, dear?'

'I tried running once, but I kept spilling my drink.'

The Boys of Indian Summer

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

"I do my best thinking in the shower... do I need to run 5 miles a day in order to take one?"

'Well you were warned about the dangers of sedentary lifestyle.'

'I must confess I admire people like you...Executives brave enough to say 'No I need a holiday.' I don't care if my clients look elsewhere, I'm not going to sacrifice my leisure time to climb the slippery pole to the very top...'

'Derek's a big fan of resisistance workouts. He always resists working out.'

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

"The only thing I like more than running is everything else."

"Sorry, dear, but vowing NOT to climb Mount Everest this year isn't a valid New Year's resolution."

"My physical therapist says this is the worst possible position you can lie in."

"I was celebrating Hump Day and ended up with Throw-Out-Your-Back Thursday."

'He loves all sports, he can sit and watch others do it all day.'

City Health Club - Ask about our no more than necessary exercise class.

Too hot to Walkman

'This getting fit is killing me.'

Trying to get kids into sports

'What? You mean I ran all the way here and got all that exercise for nothing?'

"Dr. Garcia is ordering to make a lot of changes in my life."

Walking the dog.

"The doctor said jogging would 'add ten years to your life...' He was right - I feel ten years older...!!"

"Ed's practicing his stand up routine. No, he's not a comedian...he's just standing up!"

'I went jogging this morning - actually got as far as the front gate!'

"Back from your jog already? I thought you were going to go for the burn."

"No, I'm not interested in a free ski weekend. Please take me off your call list."