Religious Satire Lovers Gifts

'Not having second thoughts, are we, Brother Thomas?'

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

'There are only ten commandments, but wait until you see the tax code!'

"I'll give them these for now, and tell them about keeping kosher later."

'Are you sure about this? - These people have NO sense of humor.'

'Please tell me those are not steel wool pads glued to your head.'

'Pent' and 'repent' trays on God's desk.

'Not bad - a bit preachy.'

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

Self raising Lazarus.

"Okay, I accept the fact that I'm doomed to spend all eternity in hell, but could I serve my time without the company of disgraced Evangelicals and television preachers?"

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

"It was better before God took up knitting."

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

A surprise in heaven

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

Gates of heaven

"Of course there's an afterlife. It's called 'death'."

Church restrooms

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

'All the tellers are nuns.'

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

"I'll convert. What does the attorney general recommend?"

The Old Enemies - Catholics and Protestants

Does this mean we lose our security deposit?

"The Brother printer is out of ink."

"And now, a few words about the feel-God factor"

Father Sinead takes confession.... "You did F%!&>$G what, you C%*T!"