Religious Satire Collector Gifts

Money or no money, root of all evil?

"It's not my fault I got the Ten Commandments and the Seven Deadly Sins mixed up!"

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

A surprise in heaven

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

"Hell, George - they even miss ME!"

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

Fish Baptism is by full emersion

Church restrooms

"Of course there's an afterlife. It's called 'death'."

Gates of heaven

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

"My God—I've forgotten the number of my Swiss bank account!"

'Someday, son, 50 of this will belong to your ex-wife,'

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

The Old Enemies - Catholics and Protestants

'Don't be so sexist, sweet cheeks.'

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

Slave Drivers.

'All the tellers are nuns.'

"I'll convert. What does the attorney general recommend?"

Thwarting the Boys from Brazil

Does this mean we lose our security deposit?

"And now, a few words about the feel-God factor"

Father Sinead takes confession.... "You did F%!&>$G what, you C%*T!"

"It is as I feared, Mr. Moran. It's definitely a stiff upper lip."

My boss is a real turd.