Religious Debate Lover Pillows

"I see you're saying grace. You should pray to me - I'll actually respond."

'If it's all the same to you, we'd prefer not to get involved.'

"That's not his real name, of course. His real name is Yeshua. It was translated into Greek as 'Içsous'. Then English translators misspelled it as 'Jesus'. Christians have been saying it wrong ever since...... ...I'm sorry to interrupt you. You were

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

'...Next election voters will have a choice of democrat, republican and 'generic'.'

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

Who's the Rogue State?

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

Under What Circumstances Would You Change Your Mind?

"Rudy, did you realize it's illegal for a boss to tell his minion how to vote?...And that therefore, I would never tell you to vote for my friend Patsy Marionette, for city council?"

Today's sermon: 'Do sin taxes violate the seperation of church & state?'

Corruption trial in the Vatican

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

'So, I take it that diversity isn't a priority?'

"Do we wait for it to be approved as an antibiotic, or do we go ahead right now and sell it as furniture polish?"

I hear you're preaching godlessness, you little heathen. I'm preaching intellectual honesty. There is no proof of a Judeo Christian almighty. You might as well believe in Zeus or the spiritual powers of a raisin scone. Where do you think morality comes from? What do you think is the basis for our civil society? The almighty! All hail the raisin scone! HOJ.

Mitt Romney: Double Guantánamo

'Doesn't this 'chosen people' thing sound a little nepotistic?'

Equal Time for All Christians

G.O.P. Hatchet Man.

"I'm just checking eBay to see if there's any movement on that new liver you need."

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

Actual Results May Vary

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

Liberals Ignore Science Too

NY Tribune Joins NY Herald on Hobby Horse of Anti-Grant Editorials

"I gave him a public education Artie ol' boy. . . you should know by now that government schools are one of my best minion corporations!"

Blasphemer! Ignoramus. HOJ. Your anti-religious rants will lead to the breakdown of morality. The divine is our source of civilization and humanity. It's what separates us from lowly animals. That and our ability to turn worthless jungle into condos. You're playing dirty now, hairless one.

Who's Your Bully?

Basic Theology

Lawyer, couple in bed - 'Natalie, remember my mother said we shouldn't go to sleep without settling things...'

Cheney offers document-leaking strategy.