Religion Reverberator Pillows

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

"You say we atheists are going to Hell? Look at all the f**ks we give... Go ahead... Look at them all."

'THAT'S the Holy Land? - You're kidding, right?'

THE ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI SHOW.

'Fortunately, the Almighty is compassionate, kind, understanding, and hopefully tone deaf.'

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

"'Thou shalt give good discounts'? That's a commandment?"

Religion & Economics.

"If atheism is a religion, why hasn't it broken up into splinter groups who murder each other?"

"If she has the voice of an angel I sure hope the others drown her out."

'Psst, buddy -- Apocrypha!'

"Just my luck."

Corruption trial in the Vatican

'Is it organic?'

'If it's all the same to you, we'd prefer not to get involved.'

Framed dollar in church secretary office says 'Our First Offering'

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

"Did we get the line item veto?"

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

Alcoholics drink alone... or with others!

"And Adam and Eve saw that they were naked, and they were ashamed."

'Do you have any coupons?'

'I warned you we'd get thrown out, changing the name from the Garden of Eden.'