Religion And Spirituality Enthusiast Pillows

"Celibate! I said celibate! Not celebrate!"

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

"What did Jesus order?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

Angry wife: 'Oh well DONE Keith! Why didn't you tell me the invite said BRING your own spirits?!'

"Redcoat is down! Repeat, redcoat is down!"

Chill Out Worshippers!

Credulity, Superstition and Fanaticism.

"Not only should science be Bible-based, Creationism, but also math, Roman numerals!"

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."

"I said 'follow,' not stalk your bliss!"

Investment Guru/Lifestyle Guru/Tech Guru/Fashion Guru

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

"Stupid HR says you can only fire them..."

Honk if you're holy.

"Do me a favor, chief. Next time you carve something in stone have it spell checked first."

"Hallelujah!"

Attila the Nun.

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

"Oh, I know He works in mysterious ways, but if I worked that mysteriously I'd get fired."

'What would you say if I told you there's a way to fit all of that on just one tablet?'