Faith And Religion Enthusiast Pillows

Parents to child - 'Our faith forbids us from providing parenting services anymore.'

Nun Fight.

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

10 Commitments? Sure, I guess I could give him those, too.

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"What did Jesus order?"

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

"I really don't care what yours says. My weather app says rain for 40 days and 40 nights. I think you should probably go with that, Noah."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

Pope Benedict 16th.

"You're right! It is a mezuzah!"

Catholic-Protestant Debates. . .

"Do me a favor, chief. Next time you carve something in stone have it spell checked first."

"Wouldn't it have been easier just to tweet those?"

"Stupid HR says you can only fire them..."

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."

Got god? (no you don't...He's got you!)

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

Honk if you're holy.

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

Attila the Nun.

They're missing a few commandments.

"Not only should science be Bible-based, Creationism, but also math, Roman numerals!"

"Hallelujah!"

"Oh, I know He works in mysterious ways, but if I worked that mysteriously I'd get fired."

'What would you say if I told you there's a way to fit all of that on just one tablet?'