Relationship Satire Seeker Pillows

Clancy: Undertakers Only Want One Thing

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

Meet the Enemy

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

Flyfishing for dummies.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

Censors 'no' a good thing when they see it.

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

'Stick them up...'

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

"Beware of the frog"

"Another flue shot, Larry.

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'

The signing of Ben Franklin's non-disclosure agreement.

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

Coronavirus Waves

"April Fools'! You should’ve seen the look on your face!"

Quality Control

"Dammit all, haven't they heard of e-mail?"