Relationship Rethinker Gifts

Divorced: Ex marks the spot

man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Do You Know It's Anniversary

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

"You used to be that ambitious."

'Oh, we don't keep score in our marriage, Dr. Downs, but if we did, I'd be winning 212 to 137.'

"To be honest, I'm not really surprised to hear your relationship isn't working out. You're not the first bacterium and penicillium to sit in those chairs and you certainly won't be the last."

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

"A cluck cluck here and a cluck cluck there,...is that all I meant to you?"

"My wife's lawyer doesn't understand me."

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

'Of course the physical side of your relationship's broken down, you've let yourself go!'

"I love what you've done with him."

Richard and Wendy Kozier, of Saddle River, New Jersey, with U.N. Peacekeeping Contingent

'I agreed to a relationship coach, not a referee.'

"She leaves wooden-handled knives soaking in the dishwater all night long. Your Honor."

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

Meaningful...Meaningless relationships.

"Oh Adam. This is the second...sorry, I mean third happiest day of my life."

"The Jacksons will be there in about an hour and I promise you guys an epic fight!"

"Have you seen my wife?"

'I think it's time we got a new headboard.'

"If you were the only man in the world, and I were the only woman. . . would we still have to diet?"

"He's all mine. Life is good."

"Hey, I know - why don't we go on a little crime spree?"

'The marriage counselor didn't save our marriage. The plumber and the second bathroom saved our marriage.'

'Well, Helen, you were right - our marriage contract does include an option year.'

"A see through nighty? God who'd want to see you through that?"

"She always gets the upper bunk."