Relationship Renegades Gifts

"Do you realize that that was the first time neither of us was married?"

'I just wanna looker for the occasional wife swap party.'

"A double wedding was a good idea. Hope that your husband and my wife don't miss us!"

'I have an even better idea, Steve -- let's get married without living together!'

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

'Your place or mine?'

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

"Can you recommend a nice red wine that goes well with a broken heart?"

Dating the efficiency expert.

"Could you speak a little louder? I'm recording this."

"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

'One question, Vicar. Is it bad luck to invite any of the other people we're sleeping with?'

"Wellness clinics, stress-management checkups, hypertension screenings, lab tests, crisis after crisis. Fibre foods, fish-oil capsules, unsaturated spreads, plaque. Say what they may, McCormack, we did it our way."

'She kept pinching the Vicar's bum!'

Marriage therapist's office is filled with erotic art.

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

'Human resources gave us the idea of trying 'blind interviewing'...'

Female Dominance.

'And you must be Hank, my husband's new business partner!'

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

Too Weird to Have a Husband

Now entering: Space. Population - wouldn't you like to know.

Letting agent on the phone: 'OK, so there's fungus in the bathroom - but on the plus side, it IS organic.'

Church Drive-Thru.

"Whaddya mean line ball? The ball was out! O.U.T.! You blind or something?"

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

Hot pink (and purple) monkey love!

'I think it's fair to say we're opposed to tame sex marriage.'

'This is our last date, Harry. I think I should see other weirdos.'

'I have an even better idea, Steve -- let's get married without living together!'

"Declared Victory Garden"

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

"And after I'm through with this, I'll show you the exciting array of other body-piercing services we're now offering!"