Relationship Quizzers Gifts

'You know, I'll be honest...I don't think you two mix very well with one another.'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

"We don't talk anymore."

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

My wife's been talking to the skin I shed for over an hour.

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

'Thou shall not covet the neighbours same sex partner.'

"This is never going to work—you're a tree!"

"A cluck cluck here and a cluck cluck there,...is that all I meant to you?"

'Wow, that was unforgettable.'-'What was?'

"If you were the only man in the world, and I were the only woman. . . would we still have to diet?"

'I fu*@!Ng hate you!!!'

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

Meaningful...Meaningless relationships.

"Have you seen my wife?"

Darn it, you're touching my half of the loveseat again. (Published originally on Feb. 20, 2008.)

"Oh Adam. This is the second...sorry, I mean third happiest day of my life."

'Love and marriage?- I'm afraid I can't help you much with that, young fellow.'

'I really like him but I can't bear waiting for THE LUNGE'

"Till death do us part? Hey, I thought this was just supposed to be a starter marriage!"

"Well, we can eat out, order in, or just sit here and let our bodies slowly gnaw away at our muscle tissue."

"Will you be passing a mailbox?"

Are you honestly trying to play footsie with me? I never mix footsie with honesty.

"If you love me you'd eat all the coconut ones I don't like."

"I'm giving love one more try."

"Apropo of nothing, would you still love me if I were a sausage?"

'Oh, that's my webcam. Probably should have mentioned that at the beginning.'

"My orgasm was fake."

"Do you ever think of getting married?"

"Hmm....who's this tall drink of water?"

Daisy Bates and Harry Morant.

"I find it hard to perform in these market conditions."