Relationship Meme Fan Gifts

Man who is 'expecting a friend every minute.'

Blowing up your ex.

"She found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline. She hit the roof."

Life is for the birds.

"First date hairball... awkward."

'Stop complaining woman, you wanted a boating holiday!'

You were warned about mixed marriages.

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

'Adam, you left the toilet rock up again!'

"Doctor - at home I get this nagging pain... what do you recommend?"

"Open a wine that will make me want to watch the shows you want to watch."

"You don't sniff my butt anymore."

"It's Doris Kearns Goodwin. Is there anything we'd like to know about the Presidency?"

"Whoa! Was that today?"

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

"This merger is not producing the expected synergies."

'Admit it, you've been laughing behind my back ever since 1957 when we went in that hall of mirrors in Skegness!'

'It's my wedding ring: My wife insists I wear it here to stop me flirting with other females...'

"Trust me. It's no big deal. I'm even tuning you out right now."

'His ego needs lipo suction!'

Still Lives: 'What's wrong, don't you love me anymore?'

"Well that's the last of our offspring gone - let battle commence."

'Roger, you're just a Rooster and I'm just a Hen. Is all of this necessary?'

'Looks like the Wentworths are still on the outs.'

"If I wanted your opinion I would have hauled you in for questioning."

'And by clicking on 'I Agree,' you agree to the terms and conditions...'

'I knew you were mad when I found nettles in my fig leaf drawer.'

What do I want out of our relationship? Same thing anyone wants. Good value.

'I used to think it was her red dress, but I've discovered I find your mother irritating in any color.'

"I'm sorry your wife doesn't understand you, but this is a dry cleaner's."

"If you'll have me, I'd like to be your blind spot."

"Ogden, you're taking yourself too damn seriously."

"I want an instant replay of you taking out the garbage."

"Manfred, don't get so defensive!"