Relationship Harmonizer Gifts

War & Peace

In the Guru District

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Take the time to do something nice for yourself. Your kids will thank you. That is, if you ever decide to have them.

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Couples' therapy

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

'Great Therapy!'

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

Commutobile

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

"There's something I have to tell you."

"You wanted the magic back in our relationship..."

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

Yeah, you're right. She's playing hard-to-get.

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

Okay, I'll admit I was wrong. But I won't say what I was wrong about.