Relationship Escapologist Pillows

"IF you wanted to leave, why didn't you just say so?"

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats!"

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'I'm not very good at mingling.'

Man at Fire Escape sees door with 'Hot Button Issues Escape',

Guru levitates while wife vacuums.

"Don't you dare try to sneak out of this cartoon!"

'Thank you for waiting. Please continue to hold and your call will bee answered as soon as we can.'

'Out of office - Please leave your emails in the inbox next door.'

"I am afraid Mr. Jones is in his career coaching session. Can I get him to call you back?"

Houdini 2019

"If my husband finds out about us. . .listen, we must cover our tracks so well that no one believes that dinosaurs and humans existed at the same time!"

"They say walking can change your life. Bye!"

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

'Wait for me!'

Danny always had trouble with math. (written on board: Ohio is the capital of Wisconsin.'

"I'm un-retiring today. Spending time with my family with hell."

"I'm out if that is a manufacturer."

'Sir! Elsworth's away from his desk again!'

'Jane It used to be jungle out there'

Tortured by music

"Another tiny victory in my never-ending quest for fun."

'Survived the audit'

"Are you sure the Russians didn't hack my answers to make me look bad?"

"Let's pretend we're divorced for the day."

'The entire building has settled seven inches since the first day of school due to the weight of the students' backpacks.'

"I fled from suppression, torture, exploitation and bullies."

'I worked so hard to get into debt, I don't have the energy to work my way out of it.'

'We're going to need a bigger rug or we're sunk.'

Halfway around the learning curve, Bob lets go.

"Please go to voicemail...please go to voice...Oh Hi...so glad I caught you!"

'Not so fast Mr. Smith... you're forgetting the fit note I've filled out for your employer.'