Relationship Drama Critic Pillows

"Yes darling, of course you're Mr. Right... It's just that Dave here, is Mr. Righter."

"I can't believe he brought her."

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

'I'd like to dedicate this next tune to those who have discovered love, gotten married, and wished desperately for death.'

'Well I wouldn't have to fake orgasms if you didn't fake foreplay!'

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

Well, if being married isn't grounds for divorce, I'd like to know what is"

'The trouble with Nigel is that he's so changeable. One minute I love him and the next minute I loathe him.'

'Huh! You men are all alike!'

"It's a legal document authorizing you to carry out a Do Not Resuscitate order on my behalf, although heaven knows, you have a hard enough time cancelling a magazine subscription."

Man in traffic jam watches couple row while eating popcorn.

'A series based on made-up stories with actors following scripts? Preposterous.'

"I don't mind if something's Shakespearean, just as long as it it's not Shakespeare."

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

Welcome to the wonderful world of abstract mime.

"I this series he plays a real dramatic roll."

"The third act could use more drama, Sophocles. Try putting in a voter referendum."

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

"I don't see what you see in him."

'Here's a list of women I want you to stay away from at the party tonight.'

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'So, did your marriage counseling work?', 'It sure did! -- She ran off with the marriage counselor!'

"Now who's being judgy?"

marionette

'I'm no good at sports, so I'll just have to settle for a trophy wife.'

'Before you say anything, just let me change my Facebook status to ‘it's complicated'.'

"It's over between us Brian. . . as soon as I've announced it on twitter."

'What a surprise,darling - a squatter!'

'We have separate bedrooms because I snore and because I can't stand the sight of her.'

Elderly spinster commenting on a marriage

Bread Winner-Need More Dough

"I don't want to get too serious."

"Don't walk away from me while I'm not paying any attention to you."

"I married him for his intelligence, turns out that was artificial as well!"