Relationship Champion Pillows

A man forming a heart symbol with his hands

Couple

In the Guru District

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"I don't love you. That's it in a nutshell."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

The best financial decision I ever made.

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Couples' therapy

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

Paint pots in love

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

Layer cake

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

'Great Therapy!'

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

A couple dressed as a knife and fork

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

"I may be obsessive and I may be compulsive, but no way am I obsessive compulsive."

"There's something I have to tell you."

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

(Man with 'BEFORE sign): 'My wife says I'm a work-in-progress.'

Yeah, you're right. She's playing hard-to-get.

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."