Reference Fanatic Gifts

'Yes, your papers seem to have lots of citations, but I've checked: They're all self-citations...'

Where your mind & battle are los

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

Profit

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'We're under capitalized. As soon as we reach the break even point we'll buy a lemon.'

Television Readers.

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

"#Win!"

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Characters jumping out of a book.

It's okay Mom! As a broker, I'm under supervision of the SEC!

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

'He's downgrading the credit agencies.'

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'

World Economic Crisis.

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

'Not bad, Ms. Newborn. But take another crack at it, and this time remember that 'earnings-per-share' is the alter upon which all other numbers are sacrificed.'

Scientist counting microscopic things he can see in his microscope

'So, gentlemen, how's the dollar trading against the immortal soul, today?'