Reel Addict T-Shirts

'He's a real beaut, Dewey! Are you going to have him mounted, or gut and fillet him?'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"Don't open me, you fool!"

'I'll never let my love of fishing come between us.'

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

'Just a couple more and we'll call it a day.'

Spooning

'Come on, come on! Bite! Oh, man... He's looking right at it!!'

"So, how's your scary movie?"

'Well, I thought crankbaits made really great stocking stuffers.'

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

"Ronny, there's not going to be any 3-D. The studio wants you to shoot it on your cell phone."

Book market

Some days Ted's head would get stuck for hours.

Even cowgirls get the blues. 'Well, howdy! I've been lookin' for this here B.B. King album forever!'

Reading room

"You're right, Son. This movie did have a great cast."

The book that will not be denied!

2001: A Space Odyssey - Updated

"Joyce Carol Oates seems to have no trouble coming out with book after book."

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

What passes today for 'nose in a book'.

"The doctor's running late. Feel free to catch up on your binge watching with our waiting room TV."

"Do you ever get to the point where you think if you read another book you'll burst, but you do anyway, and you don't burst?"

"I was admitted to heaven, but they didn't have WIFI."

"Thank you for waking me up from the witch's curse! Can you hand me my phone?"

First Place Layabout

Duckumentary: 'QUACK!'

'I'm looking for a romantic tale of wild, unbridled passion I can read while being pushed and groped on the subway.'

"And ultimately, I want to direct."

Trilby - 'A human nightingale'.

"Do I need to remind you that I have a huge Internet following?"

My mother, the PC.