Red Devil Devotee Pillows

Sir Alex Ferguson

'You wanna play another round?' 'Sure....tender, another round!'

Happy Hour

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"This is scary, maybe we should turn on the lights. Hello.."

Cloud Cuckoo Land, "Earnest's invite had lied about there being a live band"

50,000 BC: The First Engagement Ring.

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

Olympic Torch Training

"...And please let the merger do through!"

"They'd sold out of #1's."

"Just for once, why don't we forget the poor and blow the lot down the local tavern?"

Great-Great-Grandson of Godzilla

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

Little boy dragon

'A free plastic toy, cornflakes scattered around the victim... Yep, it looks like our cereal killer alright!'

"I take it this is a very special occasion."

Hire a lawyer - get one free! Limited time only.

"It's right about here that my socks fall down."

A dragon relaxing in a chair staring at a taxidermy knight's head above his fireplace.

Give Thanks.

"And while you're waiting for your drinks can I get you something from the bar?"

"Should we have dinner now, or are you watching in real time?"

'Single or double?'

'Don't drink on an empty head.'

"I was deadwood but I'm out of a job. I guess I'm driftwood."

'It was a split decision.'

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

"For such a big-ticket item, you'd think they could make the tickets bigger."

This was the first and last time Rolf bungee-jumped!

Team!

I love Kung Fu.

High wire performer has to stop at traffic lights for crossing trapeze artists.