Recruitment Specialists Gifts

"How much wood would you chuck, if given the opportunity, and presupposing you could chuck wood, aspirationally speaking of course."

"Staff support"

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

'...we have every new employee spend time on our assembly line. Eight hours, no breaks.'

"I've told you why I need a dog. Now suppose you tell me what makes you think you might be that dog."

It's a new government directive requiring us to be 58% more cheerful within 18 months.

'We feel it's very important to provide our employees with an extremely comfortable work-place environment. Primarily because we don't allow them to ever go home.'

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

"Where we lack in productivity is made up by extremely low employee turnover."