Recovering From Injury Gifts

'Bursitis.'

"So, what can I do for you?"

'Sore back?'

"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."

'Don't talk to me about having an itch you can't scratch...'

"Are you sure you're ready to get back on the ice?"

'Honey, this personal injury lawyer says that if we act now, he'll also throw in a free slicer and dicer in its own carrying case.'

Broken ankle.

'Should we abstain from sex?'

Dog fetching slippers for a man in leg casts.

"That Timmy's a real trouper-he's playing with a sprained ankle and head lice."

The frustration of a nagging injury.

'You're getting a stye.'

'I tried to shrug off my foot injury and dislocated my shoulders!'

'He tripped over a pavement sign that said 'Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault?' So he called the number and sued them'

"Sue me"

'Well, given that you have three broken ribs, laughing is bound to be painful...'

A dog bringing a pirate his peg leg.

Man with broken leg in cast.

'True, I was all for your taking up a hobby on retirement, but, TIGHTROPE-WALKING...!'

'Hot compresses! Won't cold compresses do?'

'He sprained his wrist inserting the exercise DVD.'

"Go ahead, Perkins. I can listen to your report and roll out my hammies at the same time."

Injured runner being helped by an old man.

'If they let me take you home for christmas, I'll be able to unwrap you with the presents...'

For sale trampoline.

Sorry to hear about your accident.

Footballer with a broken leg and a ball in his cast.

'Don't use that arm... for a day or two!'

'Your horoscope says 'a brilliant day for adventure and romance'.'

'Congratulations, Irwin, you've finally earned your white belt.'

'Very funny!'

'Very funny!'

Man on treadmill with one leg in a cast.

"You've broken your arm in one place... Eddie's dew drop inn."