Record Breaker Aficionado T-Shirts

"No, chasing fifteen cats in one day is not a record. . . unless all of the cats were green."

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

Spiders all over the place, "Hello, Guiness book of records?"

"Another world record - it must be faster water."

'It's a new record, mom - there are six of us in here!'

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

'Look after your feet, always wear a prophylactic and never travel faster than 300mph on water!' SAGE WORDS FROM SIR DONALD CAMPBELL!

The Specimen Hunter

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

Music Collector.

The School's new healthy lunch initiative, with it's ban on junk food, turned out to be very lucrative for Stewart.

'Put the moon up another 10 cm. I'm going for the record!'

Tube men dancing.

"I don't think you understand how an Easter egg hunt works."

Unauthorised Personnel

'Hello, Guinness Book of Records, what's the longest recorded sulk?'

World's Oldest Ball Boy.

Castaway approach desert island which has 'No Loitering' sign

'Oldest living turkey? I'll see if we have that category.'

"It's gonna be hard for my kid to have type 2 diabetes. He's used to being number 1."

"How can you call yourself a left-leaning audiophile if you've never heard NPR on vinyl?"

A long jumper reaching 18.

'The human speed endurance record holder is here to see you.'

World Records Office.