Recession Predictor Pillows

"Economists have predicted eight of the last five recessions."

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

'Do you want to tell them their department is being downsized again, or should I?'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

'I foresee a few more months of creating havoc without consequences, and then, yes, I see the 'cute' factor will start to wear thin...'

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

Warning that Inflationary Policies Could Lead to Crash on Wall St

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

Business is off the chart.

'This is from a post-ethics phase.'

'Remember, an economic boom is usually followed by an economic kaboom,'

"I love your optimism."

Sub-prime Bear

"It's swings and roundabouts – one goes up the other goes down."

'Look on the bright side; you got out of that stock before it became...unstable.'

Sales Chart Through Ceiling

"Oh, I can't complain"

Economy.

'Money is a bit tight at the moment, so instead of cash we wondered whether you'd settle for 20% more meaningless protestations of how much we value you?'

'I tried everything to turn this around but if the cops ask, I was here in this room with you guys all week.'

'Can you see the future of my 401(k)?'

Statue of Liberty and the Financial Crisis

Cigars for the Upcoming Bear Market

City Redundancies - In? Out?

'You certainly have a way with no words.'

"This is where things started getting really weird."

"Thankfully, this year, the results can be attributed to something other than our own gross incompetence."

Obama's Financial Reform Pill: I hope they won't need a glass of water.

'Fenwick is here with a dire warning about the next bubble to burst.'

Unconditional Surrender

U.S. Manufacturing - Good News & Bad News

'Well they often get it wrong.'

'Well Miss Hayward, your suggestion of trying Feng Shui didn't work.'