Recently Flown Pillows

"Frankly, I've about had it with air travel."

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

The World's Easiest Airport

Birds Following Witch.

The First Kite

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

Excess Baggage: Airline CEO's should be forced to work at the check-in counter explaining those hated add-on fees to passengers.

Airport Bored Rooms

'Sorry I'm late - I was stacked up at the airport.'

"I try to drink a lot of water, stay up and get right on L.A. time, and never eat the airline food."

'The best part is being able to fly without taking off your shoes.'

Dog on a plane.

"As a courtesy for the inconvenience, please accept a voucher for three additional hours of your life, redeemable upon your death."

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

"You're right. This is better than sex."

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

'J.B. Potts, Head of Research, Aerodynamics...'

"And that one shows my frequent flier miles."

"May I ask you, sir, if our little jingle on TV had anything to do with your decision to take along the missus?"

Did you know that hawks can travel 250 miles without flapping? Big deal. So can I.

Man skated through airport with rollers on pull bag.

"3 ounce liquids! Get your 3 ounce liquids here! Approved and ready for screening! 3 ounce liquids!"

"We'll let you know when we find your luggage. Meanwhile, you qualified for our frequent lost luggage club."

'The real fun comes when we go through airport security.'

"Loved Jamaica!"

'Lost your luggage again, Mr. Rizzi? Wow, that enables you to join our 'Frequent Lost Luggage Club'!'

"I'm glad they had these nice robes for us, because my luggage didn't make it."

"Back at work and ready to go-get-'em after a two-week vacation at O'Hare."

Learjet

It was official. She was desperate.

'Well? How was the flight?'

"I think it's time we started seeing other people"